Failing Forward, by John C. Maxell, is an entire book dedicated to the concept of failing forward. Failing forward is what it implies, being able to make mistakes and learn from them. The book is made up of 16 seemingly simple steps to do just that. Each step is given a chapter where the author discusses different steps to be successful with that particular step, and includes different stories from people he has meet or people that are well known.
Maxwell’s first step in the process of failing forward is to realize there is one major difference between average people and achieving people. During this step, he says that most people fear failure, misunderstand failure or are unprepared for failure. He explains that failure is more common than success and therefore people need to learn how to deal with their problems, or go through a sort of “training”.
Step two is to create a new definition of failure and success. He wants people to realize that failure is not something that can be avoided. He also explains that failure is not a single event but rather a process of how you deal with life. Failure is not objective, your own responses to mistakes determines whether actions fail. People think that failure is an enemy, however he argues that failure is in fact a good thing. He also claims that people think that failure is irreversible, however when kept in perspective, everything is part of the process. People think failure is a stigma, but Maxwell argues that you can make each failure a step to success. And lastly, failure is not final.
Remove the “you” from failure is step three. There is a big difference between saying “I am a failure” versus “I failed at doing something”. He gives seven abilities to not take failure personally. He says that achievers reject rejection, achievers see failure as temporary, achievers see failures as isolated incidents, achievers keep expectations realistic, achievers focus on strengths, achievers vary approaches to achievement, and achievers bounce back. To emphasize these points, he gives to story of Rudy, someone who failed at certain things, but never considered himself a failure.
Step four is to take action and reduce your fear. Some types of fear he gives are paralysis, or trying to avoid doing anything that might lead to failure, procrastination by not following through, or purposelessness. Purposelessness results in self-pity, excuses, misused energy and hopelessness. With this step, he also discussed motivation. He explains that motivation is not something that just “strikes” you. No one can force you to be motivated, and the whole concept of motivation is a trap. He explains that after you start doing something, that’s when motivation comes and it makes it easier to keep going.
Step five is changing response to failure by accepting responsibilities. For this step, Maxwell explains that people tend to make excuses when they mess up and blame other people or other factors. He uses a quote from H. Stanley Judd, “Don’t waste energy trying to cover up failure. Learn from your failures and go on to the next challenge. It’s okay to fail. If you’re not failing, you’re not growing”. He goes on to explain that people mistake quitting for failing.
Don’t let failure from the outside get inside you is step six. Being able to do this means accepting responsibility for yourself, your problems, and your failures to become better prepared to fail. The example he uses for this chapter is store owner Greg Horn. After a river flooded in Kentucky, his entire store and everything in it was destroyed. Instead of letting this stop him, he realized that by working hard to reopen the store in 21 days, he allowed 80 people return to work. This entire chapter is dedicated to having a positive attitude and being content. To him, being content means expecting the best (not the worst), remaining upbeat, seeing solutions in every problem (and not problems in every solution), believing in yourself (even if others believe that you failed), and holding on hope (even if others say its hopeless). Maxwell quotes the Norwegians as saying “there’s no such thing as bad weather, only bad clothing”.
Step seven is say good-bye to yesterday. People can either experience a breakdown or a breakthrough. There are a few signs that people are still hung up on the past. First is comparison; this is complaining about how hard they’ve had it compared to others. Second is rationalization, or by trying to make a good excuse not to get over the past. Next is isolation, or people that withdraw for self-protection. Fourth is regret, taking away energy and stops people from doing anything positive. The final characteristic is bitterness, or not processing past injuries and tragedies.
Step eight is change yourself, and your world changes. Some achievements can come as a result of failure to help you understand who you are. The problem with this is that most people don’t want to admit that they need to change. In order to reach ones potential and face your flaws you must first see yourself clearly, admit your flaws honestly, discover your strengths joyfully and finally build on those strengths passionately.
Get over yourself and start giving yourself is step nine. He starts this chapter saying “get over yourself-everyone else has”. One of the most important aspects of leadership is being able to help others. People tend to think only about themselves and feel like they are “missing something” in their lives. Work on developing a giving “spirit” helps people fill this in a positive way. He explains that you should never take yourself too serious. He jokes that the only person that should take themselves seriously is the president, however when asked about George Bush trading cards, Bush replied saying “I don’t dare ask how many hundreds of George Bush cards you have to trade to get one Michael Jordan”. Being able to keep a sense of humor is important in any leadership position. To do this, you must put others first, find out what others need and finally meet those needs with excellence and generosity.
Step ten is find the benefit in every bad experience. In this chapter, Maxwell says “we overestimate the event and underestimate the process. Every fulfilled dream occurred because of dedication to a process”. Until someone learns how to respond to experiences or adversity, they will be reluctant to ignore tradition, push the envelope, or to challenge themselves to their limits. He explains one class that was offered called Failure 101. In the class students created products that nobody would ever buy, therefore making failure and innovation the same thing, and opening them up to try new things. When trying something new, figure out what you can learn about yourself and see how that can help you with future challenges.
Step eleven is if at first you do succeed, try something harder. Risk should be evaluated not by the fear you have or how likely you are to succeed but rather by the value of your goal. He quotes Hellen Kellers’ “Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all”. The comparisons between don’t-dare-try-it-people and don’t-dare-miss-it people are made. The don’t try it people have the motto “I would rather try nothing great and succeed than try something great and risk failure”. On the other hand the do not miss it people have the motto “I would rather try something great and fail than try nothing great and succeed”. The embarrassment trap, rationalization trap, unrealistic expectation trap, fairness trap, timing trap, and the inspiration trap are all things people should make sure they don’t fall into.
Learn from a bad experience and make it a good experience is the twelfth step. One way to look at it is you can either let failure be your friend or your enemy. People learn a lot for their experiences and by failing, create different sets of priorities. You never really know who you are until you’ve been tested, and you learn so much more from failure than you ever would from success. Being teachable is an important characteristic, by being able to learn from any situation. And, as any child learns, before you can be a good winner you have to know how to lose.
The next step is to work on the weakness that weakens you. He lists the top ten reasons why people get in their own way. They are poor people skills, a negative attitude, a bad fit, lack of focus, a weak commitment, an unwillingness to change, a shortcut mind set, relying on talent alone, a response to poor information, and no goals. If you become committed to overcoming failure and achieve, you must be willing to work on your weaknesses.
Step fourteen is to understand there’s not much difference between failure and success. One important way to achieve any goal is to learn tenacity and persistence. In order to develop desire, one must find oneself, eliminate excuses, develop some incentives, and cultivate determination.
Fifteen is get up, get over it, get going. He uses the term FORWARD to explain getting back up. Finalize your goal, Order your plans, Risk failing by taking action, Welcome mistakes, Advance based on your character, Revaluate your progress continually, Develop new strategies to succeed.
The final step in the process is to go out and do it.
